Czech Jokes

Discussion in 'Culture' started by nautilus, Apr 12, 2006.

  1. scrimshaw

    scrimshaw Well-Known Member

    This is an old joke....one liner....

    It use to make audiences laugh in the 1950s.
    I wonder if it translates humorously into czech.

    Jen jsem sem přiletal a moje ruce jsou skutečně unaveni.

    I just flew in and my arms are really tired.

    That makes me think of this question.
    the dictionary says 'ruka' can mean either 'hand' or 'arm'.
    How would I say this....I scratched my left arm with my right hand.????

    similarly....I am confused by 'noha'
     
  2. Ctyri koruny

    Ctyri koruny Well-Known Member

    There's the same thing in Irish, one word for hand and arm, Lámh, I asked a native speaker friend how they got around this problem and he said "You just show them what you mean!" Irish is not so much a written language as a spoken one!

    I too wonder how they deal with it in Czech, maybe you just say you're scratching things with your fingers instead of your hands.
     
  3. kibicz

    kibicz Well-Known Member

    There is ruka and paže - ruka is usualy palm and 5 fingers = hand, but is commonly used for whole arm. Paže means arm but is used mostly oficialy, people just say ruka.

    Noha and chodidlo - leg and foot, still noha is more commonly used. chodidlo just to specify the part.
     
  4. Ctyri koruny

    Ctyri koruny Well-Known Member

    aha! cool!
     
  5. kibicz

    kibicz Well-Known Member

    btw: hows going deciphering the POLICE joke?;)
     
  6. scrimshaw

    scrimshaw Well-Known Member

    This is a tough one. But I relish a challenge.
    A wild guess
    because it is police instead of policie?
    in czech that would be a misspelled word.

    Bolí mě v ruce...can either mean my arm or my hand hurts?
     
  7. kibicz

    kibicz Well-Known Member

    "Bolí mě ruka" usualy, "bolí mě v ruce" means somewhere inside e.g. bolí mě zápěstní kůstka v ruce.
     
  8. Ctyri koruny

    Ctyri koruny Well-Known Member

    Police = Shelf
    I'm forever getting those two words mixed up when they're declined.

    That I know, but it doesn't help me understand the joke.
     
  9. scrimshaw

    scrimshaw Well-Known Member

    Ok, the dawn breaks, I think somehow together we have managed to figure it out.
    On the front of the car it says 'We deliver shelves'
     
  10. Ctyri koruny

    Ctyri koruny Well-Known Member

    Ah ha ! That is funny! But I will wait until we get confirmation from a native speaker before I laugh.

    *bites lip*
     
  11. scrimshaw

    scrimshaw Well-Known Member

    You are smart to wait for confirmation :wink:
     
  12. Jana

    Jana Well-Known Member

    To čtyři koruny: You can laugh till you burst at seams! :lol:
     
  13. scrimshaw

    scrimshaw Well-Known Member

    Úspěch!!!!!! Potrval dlouho ale, aby paprsky slunce prostrčil mlhou.

    That is a funny Hitler rant. I have seen several versions of that.
    People inserting their open dialog into the scene.
    In this one he gets upset about that a university took away his JUDr title.
    Not sure what kind of title that is.

    V těch vaších zelených mozcích je toho miń než v mým indexu....

    Odtamtud může mít titul i takovej pitomec jako jsem já...děkan tam vypadal jako Gandalf Šedý.... :lol:

    The last line is hillarious....unexpected
     
  14. Jana

    Jana Well-Known Member

    In the Czech Republic and Slovakia the Doctor of Law is a postgraduate degree awarded as JUDr. (Juris Utriusque Doctor) based upon research and completion of a dissertation. This dissertation differs from a Ph.D. dissertation in its lesser time and work (approx. 2 – 3 years for full time candidates, 5 years for distance candidates). The Ph.D. is chosen by candidates interested in an academic career since it comprises the capacity for teaching at universities.
     
  15. wer

    wer Well-Known Member

    See this for more background of the story. And see the picture.
     
  16. scrimshaw

    scrimshaw Well-Known Member

    To je směšné. Gandalf Šedý žíjí a má se dobře. To rád slyším.
    Svět potřebuje právě teď trochu kouzla.
    Kdo mezi námi je dost odvážnější, abychom k jeho společnosti připojili?
    Je tam někde určité zlo, které musí být zníčení.
     
  17. Alexx

    Alexx Well-Known Member

    Another one police car:

    [​IMG]
     
  18. scrimshaw

    scrimshaw Well-Known Member

    'To endanger and harm' instead of 'Ochraňovat a bránit'


    We're getting the hang of the game :wink:
     
  19. Yvan

    Yvan Well-Known Member

    This is a really good Czech joke which isn't politically overcorrect.
    I have it in Czech only but I think it worth of good translation into English.
    Thanks!

    Přišla paní k lékaři - modrá, zelená, zbitá.
    "Co se vám stalo, paní?"
    "Když se muž vrátí opilý z hospody, pokaždé mě takhle zmlátí. Co mám dělat, pane doktore?"
    "Udělejte si heřmánkový čaj a když přijde muž z hospody, kloktejte. A po týdnu se ukažte."
    Za týden paní přijde, žádné stopy po pranici:
    "Zabralo to, pane doktore, nezmlátil mě!"
    "Milá paní, já to věděl. Stačilo držet hubu....."
     
  20. wer

    wer Well-Known Member

    Today I came across:

    Stojí Bém na pódiu a říká publiku: „Ukážu vám kouzlo. Nechám zmizet 800 mega a uhádnu kartu, na kterou při tom myslíte.“
     

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