Typical Czech Engagement and Wedding Customs

Discussion in 'Culture' started by <3MyCzech, Mar 5, 2007.

  1. <3MyCzech

    <3MyCzech Member

    Well, its pretty obvious by my name. I am in love with a Czech man. I'm curious what the common procedures and traditions are for getting engaged and eventually married.. For instance, I don't think engagement rings are given. Because he doesn't seem to know alot about them. As a Czech person..what is a reasonable amount of time to date before getting engaged and how long does a typical engagement last? I know that it varies on the people involved and the situation. Just curious if there is any standard amount of time, people tend to wait. Does a czech man ask the women's family before proposing? Or anything else vital I need to know ? A girl can only dream :) Thank you in advance for any replies
     
  2. Eleshar

    Eleshar Well-Known Member

    Well... typical Czech engagement is something like batavian ritual of manhood. The man, in order to get his woman, must raise a pack of cattle and when asking the woman's family he sacrifices two strongest bulls of the pack in honor of both father and mother of the woman he desires. Of course, we are not in middle-ages now, so the part with raising the pack is somehow... obsolete, it is in fact completely sufficient to buy two cows (and not even necessarily bulls) and perform the offering ritual. If the parents are satisfied with the sacrifice, then the future husband invites all his friend to engagement night where they must perform a dance expressing their unity and mutual support (I think it is something like when the time of need arises, they will stand together to protect their homes). I think the ritual was very firmly established, but today it becomes more and more free and it is rather spectacular show for the passers-by (whole community is often invited to such a celebration). If the parents are pleased, the future husband comes forward to them and they pierce his ears and nose with golden earrings which he may not take off until the wedding night. In fact, it is not piercing as it once was, those earring are now rather "clasps" because it was somehow... er... messy with all the blood, and you know the healthcare was not what it is today and sometimes it happened that the husband got a very nasty infection and the wedding had to be postponed.

    Er...

    Not really.

    In fact...

    Nothing I have just written is true, except the part the we are not in middle-ages, so the wedding is essentially between the two. The Czech republic is normal country of western style, so if the two persons decide to live together and marry each other, it is only their choice. Well, I admit tat there are some more traditional families where it is desirable to ask to parents of the woman, but essentially they cannot obstruct the wedding legally (if the woman is above 18, of course:))). So I do not think there is anything special with our wedding rites in comparison to other western countries... For the time of dating, it depends... I think about 3 years is a minimum, but there are of course some crazy people who marry each other after a week's acquaintance...
     
  3. GlennInFlorida

    GlennInFlorida Well-Known Member

    Great reply - thanks for making my morning fun :D
     
  4. Sova

    Sova Well-Known Member

    You have to love the Czech sense of humor! :lol: :lol:

    The Czech "traditions" with regards to engagement and marriage (assuming there are any, of course :wink: ) are not really any different from that in the USA. In other words, they vary as much as the individuals getting engaged/married. So if you and your boyfriend are at that stage, then probably it's time to have that conversation where you start deciding how you two personally are going to procede. In the end, does it really matter how anyone else or society wants you to do things anyway?
     
  5. What a wonderful reply Eleshar has posted :D :D
    I cannot seem to stop laughing :D
    Well Done
    and
    I hope your dreams come true with your Czech Mate 3MyCzech ( just like mine did so many years ago:) )
     
  6. <3MyCzech

    <3MyCzech Member

    Well, he did his research thoroughly :) So we're engaged..hooray!! :D
     
  7. :D Congratulations on your engagement!!!!
     
  8. dzurisova

    dzurisova Well-Known Member

    Congrats!!!
     
  9. Eleshar

    Eleshar Well-Known Member

    I see even my best efforts did not save you from the shackles of marriage :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  10. barcajunior

    barcajunior New Member

  11. dzurisova

    dzurisova Well-Known Member

    I wonder <3MyCzech, how are the wedding plans going? There are a few traditions that are different. Like breaking/clean up broken dishes and kidnapping the bride.
     
  12. Dannae

    Dannae Well-Known Member

    Yes, kidnapping the bride can be fun.
    Another thing what is different; in our culture it is the mother who leads the groom "to the altar" (they go first). I do not know but I haven't seen this custom in US so far (maybe it is regional but I do not think so).
     
  13. dzurisova

    dzurisova Well-Known Member

    Which mother, the bride's mother or the groom's mother?

    In the States, the mothers (both) are the last to be seated, which is the start of the ceremony. The ushers first walk down the groom's mother to her seat which is the front row on the groom's side and then the bride's mother, front row on bride's side. The bride's mother sits and the preacher watches her for the cue. When she is ready, she stands and turns toward the back. Once she stands, the preacher says "All Rise" and the music starts and the bride's maids begin to walk. Most misinterpret the "All Rise" as the start of the ceremony, but it actually begins with the tradition of the ushers bringing the mothers to their seats.
     
  14. Dannae

    Dannae Well-Known Member

    Well, it is allways the mother of the groom, of course.
    The ceremony actually starts with this - mother walks her son (the groom) down the aisle (they start walking when the music starts). Than usually enter family members (this may vary, some may be already with other guests on both sides of the aisle, standing) and they take their places as they get in (but they most typically do not sit down), than both witnesses (we do not have best man and maid of honor) and at the end the bride is walked down the aisle by her father. Well, bride usually gets her own melody.
    In many cases the relatives, friends literally form the aisle for the bride and groom; this depends on the conditions of the place.

    To be honest, I was in a great shock when I found out that the groom's mother does not take her son to the altar here. Because I have 2 sons :cry: (still small, true); well, I think I must make sure they marry Czech girls then :lol:.
     
  15. dzurisova

    dzurisova Well-Known Member

    If I remember from your previous post, you have a 3 1/2 year old. My husband's grand-daughter is 1 1/2. She is only 1/2 Czech just like your 3 1/2 year old but we can still arrange the marriage like in the olden days. :wink: :lol:

    On a more serious note, even if your kids marry an American, you can walk them down the isle. The one thing about Americans is that we are usually open to doing things however we want rather than sticking to tradition. If you tell the bride's family that you are doing it that way, most wouldn't care.
     
  16. Dannae

    Dannae Well-Known Member

    Well, Eric is only 2,5 years old but I think we can make a deal here :lol: :lol: :lol:. I think he might be very handsome one day 8) :lol: 8), what do you say? Just kidding, of course ... [​IMG]

    Thank you for your comment here anyways (it sounds great to me); see, even if I try to adapt myself over here, some things you simply cannot erase out of your mind.

    In my home country (CR) the wedding is - in my perception - much more leveraged for both families. Father leads the bride, mother the groom. Parents of the bride pay for food, parents of the groom for drinks etc. In the US the wedding is far more perceived as "the day for the bride" but this is something I cannot fully - even if I try - agree with. Maybe not yet, who knows. I am still getting used to live here in certain ways, all takes time.
     
  17. dzurisova

    dzurisova Well-Known Member

    Oh, what a doll! He's really cute.

    Yes the wedding is all about the bride here. But I think you and your husband will be quite fine with it if tradition holds and the bride's family pays for EVERYTHING - except the rehearsal dinner which only includes extremely close family memebers and those in the wedding.

    P.S. But if we arrange my husband's grand-daughter with your son, we are doing it the Czech way. You pay for the drinks. :twisted: 8)
     
  18. Dannae

    Dannae Well-Known Member

    Sure, I hope our future relatives are not all alcoholics so Kool-Aid will do :lol: .
     
  19. dzurisova

    dzurisova Well-Known Member

    Your future relatives are Czech so what do you think? :lol: You may have to mortage your house to import the pilsener.
     
  20. Dannae

    Dannae Well-Known Member

    OK, I give up here; but I have to go to bed now (I work midnights) so let's have some fun later, ok?
    P.S. Pilsner you can buy here - but you cannot buy Gambrinus. So let's stick to this one, ok?
     

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